You wake up earlier than usual. Your smartband is vibrating because you set the alarm to 7am. It's not even that early for some people. The first logical thing that goes through your head is "not today".
But some how you manage to pull yourself out of the bed without waking up your partner, that is sleeping so peacefully. It almost makes you give up for the second time.
Feet on the ground, slowly and silently grab the clothes and the shoes to wear on the next room. Arrives at the kitchen, get a sip of coffee, check on the dogs and off you go.
Quick stretch and you decide not to take the elevator. Nope. Get down the ladder from the seventh floor that at this point you are just afraid to stumble and fall, since you woke up a few minutes ago. But it's part of the warm up, it's fine.
"Good morning!", you said.
"Good morning for you too!", the doorman replies.
And right after you cross the building door you start jogging. No time to lose.
You don't even know if you should start jogging like that. Or walking fast first. You don't even think too much because the hard part was already gone: getting out of the bed.
People walk. Cars and buses pass by. There's life around you.
And after taking a couple of steps, for the very first few minutes, you realize it's not that hard. But let's face it… it's the first day of running after weeks and months of doing nothing.
Suddenly it's just fatigue. No thoughts come to your head.
Absolutely nothing goes through your mind. Your body does not understand what is that. “Why the hell is this so consuming?", says the brain. It starts sending signals that is not okay. Legs are burning. "Please stop", says it again.
And for about 20 minutes you can't think. There are just signals.
You get tired so damn fast you can't even process anything else. Deep down you know your day just started and you will need to deal with some problems. Send some e-mails. Maybe call someone. But for those 20 minutes of pushing through the soreness and shortness of breath, the completely nothingness takes over your mind.
The reset button. An escape plan. A refuge. Shelter from one's ideas and emotions.
All you hear is the voice from the app telling how much you ran and it doesn't even matter anymore because the brain gave up on warning you. So for just a second you smile on the way back home and get happy that all that sweat is pouring out of your body.
Walking and running becomes the same. It's all very tiresome.
But you blink and get back home after those minutes of having such an empty mind.
It feels great.
—
Felipe Pelaquim • written on July 11, 2022
